Emotional Fitness
Discovering Our Natural Healing Power

by Janice Berger

Chapter Summaries

Part I: Keys for Emotional Well-Being

We readily accept and appreciate that our bodies have a natural healing power to deal with physical injuries and disease; less understood is our natural ability to heal from the suffering of emotional distress.

We all have this capacity to heal. Just as we can assist our bodies to heal physically with good nutrition, proper rest and exercise, we can also assist our natural emotional healing power by understanding how it works and facilitating its functioning.

We can all learn to access our natural emotional healing power in order to live more healthy lives.
 

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Chapter 1

Our Natural Emotional Healing Power Revealed


Imagine feeling good about yourself and feeling in charge of your life, saving energy by being open, direct and honest in your communication and seeking others who are able to be this way too, feeling free inside and exercising choice in making decisions, facing conflict openly and standing up for yourself. Imagine allowing and accepting all of your feelings and coming to know and like who you are.

We all possess this capacity. It is available to us at any age.

Subtitles in this chapter are:

What is our natural emotional healing power?
Each life is like a tapestry
Trusting in our natural emotional healing power
Feelings as signals
Can I always trust my feelings?
Our natural emotional healing power is revealed in our over and underreactions
Raw wounds
Becoming aware
 

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Chapter 2

Access Denied: Our Power Subverted


When our natural emotional healing power is subverted we do not complete feelings surrounding trauma and they stay buried within us. They become a reservoir of unfelt pain. Feelings are not buried dead; they are buried alive. They come up when we least expect them. They confuse and confound us. We control them in many different, destructive ways.

Subtitles in this chapter are:

Losing our real selves
Original wholeness undermined
Fearing feelings
Consciousness
Splitting off, becoming unconscious and disconnected
Fear of losing control
Defenses: keeping ourselves from feeling
Crucial defenses when we are young
When we cannot feel, we act out
The turning point
 

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Chapter 3

The Nature of Responsibility and Blame: A Necessary Understanding


Taking responsibility for our feelings is the major key for emotional fitness in our lives. When we take this responsibility we gain a deep emotional understanding of ourselves. We then have the possibility of having solid, caring and responsive relationships. When we do not take responsibility for our feelings, problems arise.

Subtitles in this chapter are:

Responsibility
Taking care of ourselves is an important responsibility
Accountability is not the same as blame
Blaming
Blaming ourselves
Blaming others
Manipulating
Avoiding responsibility for our actions
Responsibility to ourselves comes first
Commitment to feel is taking responsibility
Learning to change
Letting go
 

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Chapter 4

A Leap Of Faith: Learning to Use Our Natural Emotional Healing Power


It requires a leap of faith to learn to use our natural emotional healing power, since everything our conditioning teaches us flies in the face of accepting and using this process. We have all been powerfully conditioned to deny and diminish our feelings.

Subtitles in this chapter are:

The route to ourselves is through our feelings
Healing begins when we can identify our feelings
No "should" to feelings
Feeling through and connecting
From the present to the past
Self-acceptance and self-esteem
Better the devil we know
Fear of feeling deeply
Going to the deeper levels
Insight and cognitive knowing are not enough
Opening up and getting clear
Risk to heal
What feeling is stopping me?
 

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Chapter 5

Turning the Key: Supportive Activities That Help Us Engage Our Natural Emotional Healing Power


There are many activities that can help us learn to listen to ourselves, to open to our experience and to process our feelings. These activities are useful because they help us slip by our normal censors to access feelings that we are keeping hidden from ourselves.

Subtitles in this chapter are:

Journal writing
Collages, clay modelling, painting, crayoning
Developing a time line
Writing an autobiography
Writing letters that we do not send
Finding like-minded people to be with
Finding support through reading
Using our dreams
Photographs and memorabilia
Former homes
Art, drama and music
Our body
Meditation
Prayer
Language
Noticing our defensive reactions
Feeling like a child

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Go to Part II 


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